This article is from Issue 5, “Called To Obedience”
By Mark Nolan
“Have I not commanded you?
Be strong and of good courage.
Do not be afraid, nor dismayed,
for The Lord your God is with you
wherever you go.”
(Joshua 1:7)
“Lord, save me and I will serve you the rest of life!” This was my first prayer in many years, said as I faced death through blood loss, and the reality of dying without Christ was suddenly all that mattered.
Internal bleeding caused by a stomach ulcer had led me at 41 years old to a hospital late one evening, and it’s doors were closed. Were the doors of heaven closed for me? The moment I cried out to God, the doors opened and a team of nurses rushed to my aid. After receiving six pints of blood and wonderful care, I was eager to give thanks to God. He heard my cry, I was alive!
By His grace and strength, I made it to the hospital chapel morning service in weakness and my patient gown, only to have my joy added to when I realised that it was Resurrection Sunday. “Hallelujah! Thank You Jesus for saving me!” I shouted. Christ was risen and so was I!! Life, my life, was never going to be the same again.
That was 21 years ago, and throughout those years, The Lord has taken my first cry to Him very seriously. He saved me from physical and spiritual death and gave me life! It was my part now and always, to serve Him.
In the beginning, I knew the Bible was God’s living Word and could be trusted for instruction and learning, but hearing God’s voice within my spirit, speaking to me…..instructing me…..this was altogether different and new. At times His voice brings great comfort, at others it leads to face a challenge.
“MARK, READ”
As new believers, The Lord had led my wife and I to a small evangelical fellowship who were faithful in gathering together and we were blessed to meet several times in the week for prayer and Bible study.
However, since childhood I’d had a severe speech impediment which led to a terror of reading aloud in public. This had been a hindrance to me most of my adult years, and now I was faced with my worst fear again at the Bible studies. What was I to do? I didn’t want to be stressed, terrified and anxious the whole time. I had a quiet word with the pastor…..he understood.
It was agreed, that as we sat in a circle with our allocated readings, I would be automatically skipped over. Phew! What a relief, I could just relax and enjoy the studies. This arrangement worked perfectly for several months until my dread of dreads happened.
This particular mid-week Bible study was well underway and I was sitting comfortably until I heard The Lord say to me, “Mark, read.” I couldn’t believe what The Lord was asking me to do. Surely He wouldn’t ask this of me when He fully understood how overwhelmed I felt. I knew that if I thought it over I would probably never do it. I wanted to be obedient, so before I could talk myself out of it I said out-loud to the group, “I want to read if that’s okay.”
They looked at me in astonishment, and said “yes of course,” but I had to wait my turn as there were three or four others to read before me, which added to my stress!
As my turn to read came closer, absolute dread mounted up that I can’t explain, my heart was pounding with fear, and I was sweating profusely. I thought that I wouldn’t be able to get my words out and I would die of embarrassment, but to my utter surprise, that didn’t happen.
They were taking turns reading through Philippians 4, and then it came to my verse that I had to read. I took a deep breathe and read out what was next…..
“I can do all things through Him Who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13)
What a verse to read! The people in that room were astounded at The Lord’s beautiful way in our midst. This was a massive break through for me. The Lord wanted me to be free and I knew at this point that He had delivered me from a stronghold of fear, and had taught me that I could trust Him regardless of how inadequate I was.
From that moment on, I knew that I could indeed do anything The Lord would ask me to do in obedience, no matter how impossible it may seem, by His strength.
OBEDIENCE LEADS TO VICTORY
This was a key moment in my Christian walk in many ways. I learnt that I could and must have confidence in hearing God’s voice. I saw that He plans ahead and prepares without informing us of the details! The timely verse that God arranged for me to read was evidence of that. I saw that what ever He asks us to do, it is for good never for harm, despite how overwhelming and uncomfortable the task may seem.
I also saw that God wants to deliver us from the fear of man, that it is indeed a terrible hinderance.
When The Lord told me to read, I wanted to hide in a hole. Have you ever felt like that? Proverbs 29:25 says “The fear of man brings a snare.” Are you ensnared by the fear of man? Has The Lord prompted you to do or say something, or go somewhere and you have resisted because of a spirit of fear?
Dear brother, dear sister, we are servants to whom ever we obey, be it God who always gives us the victory, or be it satan who would control with fear. If fear is holding you back, then it is an enemy to your own walk and to God’s plans. The only way to defeat an enemy is to face it, and for that very reason The Lord often calls us to what we would take pains to avoid.
Though I read aloud on that first night, I knew it was just the beginning, and I needed to keep on reading regardless of how I felt, and feelings were rarely on my side.
The inward pressure to “retreat” has been great at times over the years, but God had given me His own assurance that He was with me, that He was strengthening me. I didn’t have to lean on my own abilities or confidence. Whenever I feel overwhelmed, I look to The Lord and hold to what He’d said, “I can do ALL things through Him Who strengthens me.”
He never changes, but we are to go on from strength to strength. Obeying God’s voice in that Bible study meeting was the key to releasing me for service. At the time I didn’t know that I would go on to hold Bible studies, that I would preach and teach, and that I would read The Word to strangers seeking after God in the streets! With God, all things are possible. Only trust and obey.
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” (2 Tim 1:7)
Taken from Life On The Altar Publications
Issue 5 Summer 2022
Called To Obedience
LIFE ON THE ALTAR 